(no subject)
Jun. 7th, 2006 12:50 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
macdobhranA biker was riding along a California beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish."
The biker pulled over and said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want."
The Lord said, "Your request is materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that would honor and glorify me."
The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, "Lord, I wish that I could understand my wife. I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy."
The Lord replied, "You want two lanes or four on that bridge?"
The biker pulled over and said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want."
The Lord said, "Your request is materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that would honor and glorify me."
The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, "Lord, I wish that I could understand my wife. I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy."
The Lord replied, "You want two lanes or four on that bridge?"
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(no subject)
Date: 2006-06-07 05:06 pm (UTC)OT
Date: 2006-06-07 05:12 pm (UTC)Re: OT
Date: 2006-06-07 05:13 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-06-08 01:14 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-06-07 05:07 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-06-07 05:16 pm (UTC)We are not that hard to understand.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-06-07 05:21 pm (UTC)~soda blows from nose, onto keyboard~
you are a wonderful and beautiful woman lisa ... I find you interesting, funny, and enjoyable to be around ...
but I call bullshit on your ststement
(no subject)
Date: 2006-06-07 05:25 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-06-07 05:28 pm (UTC)Guys are as simple as can be - give us a steak, a beer and a blowjob, and we'll build a damn house for you.
PUH-LEEZE!!!
Date: 2006-06-07 05:32 pm (UTC)Boolsheet!!
Oh - oh boy. Would I rant, if I didn't want to get slime and spittle all over my darling Gar's journal.
Riddle me this Batman: If that's ALL that guys want, why is it when you GIVE it to them, they suddenly decide that maybe they should walk away from all that goodness on a MAYBE?! Don't make me cite examples.
Re: PUH-LEEZE!!!
Date: 2006-06-07 05:41 pm (UTC)ok ... I think I see the issue
Date: 2006-06-07 05:43 pm (UTC)my 2 cents - ANY guy who got the steak, beer, and blowjob from you, then failed to do anything for you as a result, is either terminally stupid or dead (was his woody cold?)
I went through a miserable divorce ... still hate the psycho hose beast ... I can cite many examples of giving and getting nothing in return in that relationship ...
I can happily say I got it right the second time, and am completely blissed out more than I probably deserve ...
so all I can do is wish the same bliss for you ...
Re: ok ... I think I see the issue
Date: 2006-06-07 05:54 pm (UTC)Re: ok ... I think I see the issue
Date: 2006-06-07 06:22 pm (UTC)fortunately for me, my experiences in that regard haven't been recent (hope that statement doesn't inspire anybody I know to get stupid) ...
(no subject)
Date: 2006-06-07 05:24 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-06-07 08:23 pm (UTC)'nuff said...
(no subject)
Date: 2006-06-08 01:15 pm (UTC)Not related, except...
Date: 2006-06-07 06:45 pm (UTC)And here's a joke for you:
The Mural
An eccentric billionaire wanted a mural painted on his library
wall, so he called in an artist. Describing what he wanted, the
billionaire said, "I am a history buff, and I would like your
interpretation of the last thing that went through General Custer's mind before he died. I am going out of town on business for a week, and when I return I expect to see it completed.
Upon his return, the billionaire went to the library to examine
the finished work. To his surprise he found a painting of a cow with a halo. Surrounding this there were hundreds of Indians in various stages and different positions of making love. Furious, he called the artist in.
"What the hell is this?", screamed the billionaire.
"Why that's exactly what you asked for" replied the artist smugly.
"No! I didn't ask for a mural of pornographic filth, I asked for a mural of the interpretation of General Custer's last thoughts!"
"And there you have it," said the artist,
"I call it 'Holy Cow Look At All Those F**king Indians!"
Re: Not related, except...
Date: 2006-06-07 07:04 pm (UTC)Re: Not related, except...
Date: 2006-06-07 09:13 pm (UTC)